FF 1

Tue, 31 May 2011 17:40:15 -0500

Nope, not a typo. That’s what Marvel renamed the Fantastic Four reboot. FF. It stands for Future Foundation. Now I should state that I was never a Fantastic Four fan. Never really got into the title and I’ve largely ignored the story lines unless they affected the rest of the Marvel universe in some way. I have to say bringing in Spider-man to replace the recently deceased Human Torch was cool (even though it seems they’re putting Spidey in damn near every team book), the reason he joined makes sense and his new costume is ok (he’s got line 15 now). But here’s the thing, with a reboot and a new #1 you want to make the series open for new readers and not bog it down with alot of details they won’t understand.

This is where FF#1 fails miserably.

There are about 6-7 extra characters that I have no idea who they are. I mean they have a 10 yr old clone of Dr Doom living with them, no explanation for it. A disembodied flying head of a moleman, no explanation. There are 3 blonde kids and I have to guess which is which half the time and one is like 9 years older than the other, sloppy. Way to many supporting characters with no real point and with most of them being kids it makes FF feel like a daycare. The issues in Amazing Spider-man that deal with the FF DO help out quite a bit but Marvel kinda dropped the ball with this first issue (although not as much as they did with Spider-girl #1, which is now canceled) I’ll try a couple more issues but I just can’t recommend FF#1 to any new readers.

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Mean Girls 2

Sun, 30 Jan 2011 19:25:37 -0600

Imagine:
You’re an aspiring A lister, with a muck of a resume. You try out for an ambiguous role in a teen movie. You’re attractive but a far cry from perfect. You get a call back. Hooray! The execs like you! They aim to cast you in the sequel to the most successful teen movie ever. It’s Mean Girls 2. You sign the papers briskly as it seems like they may rip the offer from your starving hands if any consideration is detected. The papers are signed. You are the next Lindsay Lohen!

After you sign your soul away you are quietly informed that the movie will never get a theatrical release. EPIC FML.

Mean Girls 2 got pwned all the way down to cable release, with good reason. Its about as charming as abc food. The story doesn't try to diverge from the original, and they even managed to recycle some of the great lines from the 1st movie.

Here is my small list of problems with Mean Girls 2:
The plastics are not hot enough.
The budget is obviously truncated.
Dialog sounds anything but natural.
And finally, this movie did not resurrect hot Lindsay Lohan.

For the long list search anywhere on the internet.

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Nervous Chicken

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 20:25:51 -0600

Alright, I’m just going to put this out there: if you own a computer and have some sort of audio creative software on it (i.e, GarageBand, Fruity Loops, Audacity or Sound Booth) DO NOT attempt to try and be a musician. For whatever reason this age of technology is enabling people with no sense of what real music is, exploit their lack of talents.

I recently picked up on this trend while listening to the group Nervous Chicken. In all honesty, I do judge a book by its cover and with a group name like that; why would I pass them up? Turns out I should have quit while I was ahead. Their single Red Jungle, which is also the name of their album, is nothing short of just noise. I’ve heard my fair share of noisecore and techno, but come on, these guys made me ask myself: “Why the EFF are you still listening to this?!”

If you run into someone who might be considering this band, or if you’ve been given a recommendation, turn it down. ASAP.

epic music fail.

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Spider Girl #1

Thu, 13 Jan 2011 08:40:00 -0600

"Warning! The only things standing between you and the most synapse-shattering super hero debut of the decade are your hands and this cover!"

This was the message I was greeted with on the cover of Spider-Girl #1 as it caught my attention in the comic shop, along with the image of a cool looking chick in a Venom-esque black and white costume. So I was like "Ok, that's a bold statement and she looks cool so this should be a great comic!" I was so very wrong. Spider-Girl #1 was dull, boring, pedestrian and about as "synapse-shattering" as a trip to the dentist.

Most of the book is trying to force a connection between Araña, a reused character from another series, and the Fantastic Four. Yep, it slapped me right in the face! I just bought a comic about a powerless 15 year old girl in a suit and a swing line and they're calling her Spider-Girl.

The book is filled with excessive awesomeness, yawn... Spider-Girl stops a mugging! Spider-Girl chases down a D-list parkour-using villain named Screwball. Spider-Girl prevents a cat from being stolen. Yes, this is all very serious hero stuff.

Thanks Marvel for stomping all over an already tired franchise. And oh yes, using tweetvertizing is going to really help reel in the youngsters so they can use Spider-Girl like a warm glass of milk at night. Spider-Girl will put you right to bed.

This has to be one of the most disappointing comics I've picked up in quite awhile, it was almost like the cover message was a sarcastic joke Marvel was making at the reader's expense. Your $3.99 could be better used buying a new toilet scrubber.

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Oakley Fuelcell

Thu, 16 Dec 2010 21:41:06 -0600

Ok, I know Oakley is a popular brand. Athletes, old folks and douchebags alike seem to like the brand. (Hell, I have an Oakley watch and laptop bag for my macbook pro). And in the past I've loved some of their older frames like the Juliets. But I have to say, these new "Fuel Cell" shades I've seen a lot of people wearing just look like the cheap crap you'd find in a Korean flea market knockoff shop.

I wanted to give them the benifit of a doubt and inspect them up close. Well, it got worse. The "O MATTER®" material they're using for the frames make them feel like the kind of toy sunglasses you'd give a 5 year old. Big let down.

Basically Oakley is selling you those knock offs you bought at the gas station one afternoon for $10 and charging $150. Yes I'm sure the lenses are super badass and all that. But c'mon Oakley! I'm not paying premium prices for glasses made of Lego plastic. Sorry.

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Billionaire Boys Club x Starter Cap

Mon, 29 Nov 2010 01:38:59 -0600

You know what I absolutely hate about this hat? Too damn much going on. How many logos do you need to adorn your head with anyways? It reminds me of the type of hat a radio station gives away at a charity event. Furthermore, it looks like an exercise in elementary level branding.

BBC, I would rather watch your top notch science fiction programming than purchase your lame short-bus-ready apparel.

Peace!

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Girls

Sat, 20 Nov 2010 22:11:58 -0600

I don’t know if its this chilled-to-the-bone weather, but the sound of the summer - beach-pop, lo-fi, indie-gaze, whatever - seems to be waning, if just a tad. Or maybe its me, I’m not sure. I listen to Wavves and Summer Camp these days when I want be warm, I’m too over stimulated to be able to conjure up a summery tropical island just from sheer imagination.

The Girls album was good, I liked it. Unfortunately, the song after the first (and best) song kinda sucked so I found hard to make it through the whole thing, but yeah, I did like it. This new EP they’ve released Broken Dreams Club isn’t as tragically attractive as the title would have you believe. In fact, its far too nice and pretty.

That’s my nice way of saying its boring. Maybe the 2nd half of the 6 song EP was nice, I didn’t get that far.

If you want to hear “beautiful” music from a long haired blonde guy (yeah, he’s got a pretty mouth) that used to be in a cult (i think). Then this is your game for sure. If you want to hear fellow writer Jan-Michael sing their hit Lust for Life, just txt me asap.

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The North Face Purple Label “Harris Tweed” Pack

Fri, 5 Nov 2010 20:43:22 -0500

I am so sick of plaid, tweed, or any other pattern that involves squares! I remember a time not so long ago when it was gangsta to rock argyle sweaters with some sickening kicks, but to seems as though the hipsters have ushered us into a new era of pixelated nonsense.

Plaid does not look cool kids, i’m effin serious!

Tweed is not fetch!

And for crying out loud, the vest will never, ever, ever be cool ever again!

Ill just stick with what I know which is urban, super premium, special edition, semi referential, pop-culture kicks. Maybe I am just too hip to be a square.

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YUP

Sat, 23 Oct 2010 00:31:54 -0500

You raff you ruse!

G-Shock X Complex Force Unleashed 2

Wed, 20 Oct 2010 22:27:01 -0500

The highly anticipated follow up “Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II” will be released later this month, and in preparation Complex Magazine and G-Shock teamed up for a tie in collaboration.

Two custom designed DS-6900s will use elements from the Star Wars Universe to bring some Sith action to your wrist. One referencing Starkiller, the other Darth Vader.

So much more could have been done with these limited edition pieces. The character of Starkiller is a jaded and confused pawn in a grand master plan to overtake the Emperor decades before Luke ever gets a chance; yet all we get is a royal purple abomination with “force lightning” graphics. Looks like something pulled out of a Happy Meal.

The Darth Vader model only shows signs of the Sith Lord himself with some chest panel graphic. Lord Vader would not hesitate to force choke who ever was responsible for this poor design work.

With the slew of Star Wars licensed collabs being released this year, one would come to expect more from Marc Ecko and co. May the force be strong with anyone who decides to rock these.

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Patagonia Special Edition Down Sweater

Sat, 7 Aug 2010 18:31:28 -0500

Taking a trip to Pluto? No. Well unless your @KanyeWest this jacket will render any normal human being sweating balls.

Not only does this jacket resemble the “Stay Puff Marshmallow Man,” it also doubles as a pack of geese. You got it folks this goose down filled jacket will immediately kill any Zombie with mild allergies.

The only thing positive I can say about the circulation of this type of apparel is that it will be a great scavenge item in the event of a post apocalyptic nuclear winter.

Stay down puppy!

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Curren$y

Wed, 4 Aug 2010 21:35:03 -0500

Its never a good sign when your favorite song on a CD is because of another artists verse on the album. Curren$y, the newest hipster friendly hip hop artist, has achieved this feat with his new CD “Pilot Talk”. I had high hopes for this album, now I’m trying to figure out what to listen to so i can forget it.

The album wasn’t a total pile of shit by any means but just lacked any sort of progression or heart, and just sounded like a more boring version of Wiz Khalifa, another up and coming hip hop artist. Even collabs by huge names like Mikey Rocks of the Cool Kids, Mos Def, Jay Electronica couldn’t save this CD from making me feel like giving this CD another shot. One song with Devin the Dude did seem to redeem itself but that was just because Devin can do no wrong so that really doesn’t count.

Curren$y, who hails from New Orleans and has been with labels like No Limit, and Young Money Ent, isn’t new to the game with 14 mix tapes and independent albums out. I confess I haven’t heard it all, but when I downloaded “How Fly”, his mix tape with Wiz Khalifa, last year I thoroughly enjoyed it for it’s fresh, crisp beats and entertaining weed induced lyrics. This CD misses that mark, or maybe just doesn’t add anything to the genre. Whatever the case the more I listen to the album the less I really want to. There seem to be so many other artists who are blending smooth alternative hip hop beats and stoner hipster lyrics.

This CD should just get lost on the bottom of the pile.

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Blood on the Dance Floor

Mon, 19 Jul 2010 16:56:18 -0500

This may very well be the best TRASH post of my GD life, period. All of the setup work is done for me via BOTDF’s Myspace bio.

And I quote:

“Once apon a time there was a boy named Dahvie Vanity.. And one day he decided he wanted to create something amazing.. That no one had ever done before.. And he wrote a song about sex. But not just any song.. A building block for the crazy world he was building for all of us. And then.. He met his match.. His missing piece..Everything he could ask for. A sick ghoul named Jayy von monroe. Instantly it took off.. Fast hard and huge. And they together made the frankenslut monster of today. BOTDF with a few goregasms chronic masturbation..slapping hoes.. and glitter orgies the eargasm your about to intake is like no other. and that is the story of blood on the dance floor

Truley yours xxx

BOTDF !!!!“

These guys are being billed as the new filth of the 11yro scene nation, sponsored by our very own interweb celebrity, Jessi Slaughter. I personally think that Jessi should be getting paid for her efforts to launch this whorendous Florida based band into internet fame/stardom/riches.

A few fun factoids, in order of irony.

The origin of the band name Blood on the Dance Floor is taken from a Michael Jackson album.

Band member Dahvie Vanity is an alleged Pedobear

11yro Jessi Slaughter allegedly may have had interactions with BOTDF lead man, Dahvie Vanity.

Charming...

Links
Jessi’s Story
BOTDF Lamespace Sticky Drama

Feel free to click on all links on this page for a popcorn worthy entertainment experience.

More discussions on this will be available on the Tuesday, July 20, 2010 podcast, check back often for updates.

Podcast Link

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Sprint Overdrive 4G

Mon, 26 Apr 2010 20:13:22 -0500

ZOMG MOBILE HAWTSPOT!!!!

Alright boys and girls recently I took a little trip to the Sprint store and checked out their latest pride and joy, the Overdrive. Now I know what your thinking "but prospect, we're in a recession!!" and that's why you'll be glad to hear that they are offering a one month trial. Thankfully if your unhappy with it, they'll ignore the 2-year contract that you've signed and give you a full refund.

The 4G speed isn't even what 4G is really supposed to be at, but Im not going to lie I was actually impressed with the device when I was testing it out at home .....then things took a bit of a darker turn for the hopeful gadget when it was time for some field testing. While a couple of friends and I were driving around it kept popping in and out between 4G and 3G. The 3G speed wasn't too bad, but when you have unlimited 4G data plan with only 5GB's of 3G per month. Im sure most of you will agree with me when I say the charges for going over this limit aren't going to be too much fun. So ixnay on using it in the racaye.

Next up I tried using it everywhere I go on a normal day. To it's demise if you try and use it in the center of a certain University it only picks up 3G signal and makes you wonder why your paying $60 a month for 4G. Later that day I ended up going to a local mall and for some reason only certain corners of the mall would pick up 4G and the majority would leave you stuck with 3G once again. By now the Overdrive's battery was running kind of low, seeing as how it lasts a grand total of 2.5 hours. I mean you could turn it into a parasite by connecting it to your laptop via USB and breathe a little life into the Overdrive while sucking it out of the laptop, but all in all it's a /fail

Seriously though it'd be easier, and HELLA cheaper to hit up a free wifi-hotspot that will give you speeds that are a bit faster and you won't have to worry about your battery dying in about 2 hours. So either take my word for it and save your money or take up Sprint's offer to find out for yourself.

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Jeremy Scott - Spring 2010

Tue, 6 Apr 2010 22:44:08 -0500

Jeremy Scott’s obsession with American Pop Culture can be seen in past collections, but for his first drop of the Spring 2010 season, he decided to go back in time.

The collection pays homage to the Hanna-Barbara 60’s animated series The Flintstones with fringed shirts, ties, and tees. With much respect to Scott, this collection is just atrocious. The campiness of the beloved animated series doesn’t translate to real world appeal, which not even Halle Berry could save. The use of purple and orange are better saved for the runway than the street. The cartoony faux fur is a poor use of graphic design and does nothing other than capture the essence of Fred and Wilma.

When Young Money’s “Bedrock” began bubbling to the surface of the Top 40 Billboard Chart cesspool, I feared it bleeding into other cultural markets. This is proof.

Now I’m not against references to pop culture staples, but pick one that translates. Were the licensing rights for The Jetsons in use?

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