Our mission at TheCritique.net is to provide intellectuals with the knowledge and skills they need to continue their lives at the top of the moral and ethical food chain. We aim to inspire the highest pretentiousity in all of our readers, and vow only to write about things that are of the utmost importance in consideration with timeless trends in movies, music, and fashion.

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With our patented road fork navigation system, it’s never been easier to get the gossip you crave. Click the Trash to read about the most dismal of accomplishments. Alternatively, click the Pedestal for everything and anything bomb. You may also notice some bolded words, these are functional vernacular or slang.